Life and family seem to conspire against our being able to catch up as often as we would like with our long-term friends from Reading but after months of skirting around each other we had finally agreed on a weekend when we could get together at last. Unlike the usual arrangement of meeting for Sunday lunch at a restaurant equidistant for us both we had decided to get more adventurous. Here is a transcript of the text traffic between the movers-and-shakers as the plans developed:
Maur: We are free all that weekend; Phil fancies going to the RHA garden down in Sussex. Do you fancy that?
Lib: Sounds good. Shall I book a couple of rooms at a Premier Inn somewhere on the way?
Maur: Great!
Lib: What is the name of the garden?
Maur: There are two, one near Rye and one nearer to Maidstone.
Lib: We could do one on Saturday and the other one on the way home on Suday?
Maur: Good idea!
Lib: I will text you when we have left and or ETA.
Maur: We are always early risers, so we will wait for you in the car park, OK?
Lib: No problem but we will aim to get there about the same time as you.
Maur: OK, well we should be there about 9.30 for breakfast.
Lib: Now you are talking my language! Looking forward to catching up.
Maur: Hi you guys we are on our way and reckon we will get there about 9.15 but don’t worry, we will save a sausage for you!
Lib: Make that two sausages, I’m starving! The Satnav has us down to be there around 9.25 but the way Dave is driving we will either be there at the same time as you or not at all!
Maur: Tell him to calm down! I’ve just told Phil that we may be going past Brands Hatch but that still doesn’t make him Lewis Hamilton.
Lib: Not with that ginger hair, it doesn’t! And at 6’ 4” isn’t he a bit over-height? See you soon.
Maur: Just seen a sign post saying five miles to go so not long now.
Lib: We’ve just pulled into the Car Park. We are parked near the toilets, naturally, as Dave needs to pay a visit.
Maur: Phil is driving with his legs crossed, so I think that’s a great idea for us too. See you soon.
Maur: Can’t spot the toilets?!?
Lib: They are off to the left as you come in just in front of the Farm Shop.
Maur: What Farm Shop?
Lib: The big black double-fronted wooden building!
Maur: Where are you parked?
Lib: In front of the Farm Shop.
Maur: No, I mean WHERE are you parked?
Lib: About 10 metres from the entrance to the Farm Shop on the right. We are in the black car.
Maur: I don’t do metric. What I mean is where are you? We are in the car park and there is only one other car here and no Farm Shop?
Lib: You must be in a different car park! What is the postcode where you are? What can you see?
Maur: We didn’t use a postcode, we just turned in at the brown sign that said Sissinghurst Castle.
Lib: Sissinghurst!! We are at Great Dixter! Sissinghurst is Sunday!!
Maur: No matter, it’s really nice here but we are about 30 minutes away from you.
Lib: Got it! Yes, about 30 minutes according to our Satnav. See you soon.
Maur: Just pulling into the car park.
Lib: What do you mean “Just pulling in”? You’re already there. We are about five minutes away from Sissinghurst.
Maur: Oh bugger! We’ve just got to Great Dixter. Phil is in the toilet and I’m in the Farm Shop. You’re right, it is big.